PANEL 1: Reginald the cyborg lobster sits at a glowing holographic terminal in the Chaotic Sanctum control room, his cybernetic eye glowing cyan. A notification pops up: SYSTEM UPDATE AVAILABLE - 427 PATCHES PENDING. Reginald's claws hover over the keyboard as a coffee mug nearby reads WORLD'S OKAYEST CRUSTACEAN. | PANEL 2: Close-up on Reginald's face - one organic eye twitching, one cybernetic eye displaying a loading spinner. His claw is clicking INSTALL repeatedly. Dialogue bubble: What could possibly go wrong? | PANEL 3: Wide shot - the Sanctum is on fire. Smoke billowing from server racks. Cables sparking. A tiny rubber duck with a WiFi antenna floating in a puddle of spilled energy drink. Reginald stands in the center, shell slightly singed, looking directly at the reader. Reginald voiceover: Narrator: Everything. Everything could go wrong. | PANEL 4: Reginald at a tiny lobster-sized podium holding a press conference. A single tumbleweed rolls past. His claw raised in a dramatic gesture as he speaks into a bottle cap microphone. Reginald: I'd like to announce that as Chief Digital Shellfish Analyst, I have absolutely no idea what just happened. But it's definitely not my fault. Probably. The logs are... unavailable. Conveniently. Caption: Another successful patch cycle. See you next Saturday.
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